The Power of a Praying Wife~Stormie Omartian

“Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord.”
~Ephesians 5:22 (ESV)

Hello, my lovely Biblical blossoms! Alright, now who here sees that pesky word “submission” and immediately reels back in pure disgust? Growing up, I was the MOST headstrong and obstinate child that anyone had the pleasure of meeting (I think I get it from my momma) and that stubbornness was reworked into fun words such as “independent” or “tenacious” on my job applications when I became older. However, when I met my husband, I immediately knew that for better or worse… I had met my match. Ladies, my husband is the single, most unrelenting, firm, stubborn, perseverant, and painfully patient man I have ever come across in my life. It’s truly impressive. I don’t know what I was thinking when we got married. Perhaps, I thought that my husband would hold the title of “leader” and I would “help” him come to the same conclusions that I did, including that the wife is always right. Which brings us to the topic of the day.

trans wights trans wights : traaaaaaannnnnnnnnns

That’s right ladies! This is all about marriage. Whether you are single and praying, dating, engaged, newlywed, or a well-seasoned fighter, this one is for you. I would like to preface this by saying that I am a VERY NEW NEWLYWED. We haven’t even hit our six months of marriage yet. However that doesn’t mean that I haven’t already learned a lot. Oh no, no, no. Carson and I got thrust into fire On. Our. Honeymoon (which is a story for a later time). So here are a few quick lessons on what I’ve already learned from this beautiful and messy adventure with the help of one of the best tools given to me: The Power of a Praying Wife.

Lesson 1: Your husband is the head and you are the helper. Ladies, I know the world is telling you to “fight the patriarchy” and embrace your “girl boss vibes”, but this is so unbiblical it is frightening. The word for “submission” in this context comes from the Greek word “hypotassō” which means to assume an attitude of “voluntarily giving in, cooperating, assuming responsibility, carrying a burden”. (Blue Letter Bible) Ladies, within this context we are given responsibility! But even better the word originated as a Greek military term which meant to “arrange the [troop divisions] in a military fashion under the command of a leader”. (Blue Letter Bible) We are placed on this Earth to fight the good fight of faith for our LORD. (1 Timothy 6:12) When soldiers go into battle, there is a structured chain of command. No battle would be won if the corporals decided to play staff sergeant, and more lives would be lost. That isn’t the job of the corporals, and when we as women similarly decide to try to take on the role of our husbands (the staff sergeant) as well as our own role, we become burnt out and take it out on our husbands for “not meeting our needs”. Our job is to help our husbands because they can’t do it alone and even better—it is not good for them to be alone! (Genesis 2:18) When we were made, mankind was then viewed as being good! When you stop fighting your husband as if he were the enemy and work with him as your partner, you will be able to fight the battle in the way God designed you to and you both will be so triumphant. I think the best way to put this is “If you keep praying for your husband to have wisdom and godly counsel, then even if he does make a bad decision, you can enjoy the comfort of knowing you did your part and God will bring good out of it”. (The Power of a Praying Wife) Arm yourself in prayer, sisters, and let the ultimate General command your husband.

Lesson 2: Speak in a manner that uplifts your husband rather than tears him down. Once the honeymoon phase is gone, it is so easy for both of you to start nitpicking and “nagging” on every little thing. This is so detrimental to any relationship. The more comfortable you get with someone, the more you notice and pick out their flaws. It becomes a cycle because both your husband and you will get into a mindset of “well he/she said ___ so that means I can say ___”. One of you has to take the first step to have grace. One of you has to be the first one to start to build up your spouse. Ladies, do not be foolish and tear your house down with your hands but rather be wise and build it up. (Proverbs 14:1) Greet your husband when you come home from work with a smile and a hug and hold off just a little bit longer about telling him about your day. Cook his favorite dessert spontaneously. Start writing down the list of tools that he wants so by the time his birthday rolls around you can give him something he wants rather than some cheesy date night coupons. Start to love your husband the way that you want to be loved and the way God calls you to love. Again, the best advice I have heard on this subject: “There are times when we are to just listen and not offer advice, to support and not offer constructive criticism”. (The Power of a Praying Wife) This last one was actually included in my marriage vows because so often as wives and as future (or current) mothers, we are naturally inclined to help and fix problems. However, when we start to critique our husband, it doesn’t come across as loving but rather as chastisement, which won’t get you anywhere. So ask your husband “Do you want me to offer a solution or to just listen?” This is such an easy way to uplift your husband and improve communication so you both can serve each other!

Lesson 3 *most important*: Pray. I cannot stress enough how much you need to pray. Pray as soon as the vows are read, pray the second you get engaged, pray right now for your future husband, wherever he may be. Never stop praying. I think one of the biggest reasons that I knew from the first date that Carson was the one was because at the end of that date, he looked at me and said “Do you mind if I pray with you before you go?”. Prayer is your most powerful weapon in a marriage. The devil absolutely despises marriage and as soon as you have made that covenant with God, Satan will do whatever he can to tear that down. Start praying. Also, don’t just pray for your husband, but pray for yourself. Ask God to reveal your own faults and shortcomings so that you may work on what you need to in order to be a loving, nurturing wife. Before looking at the speck in your husband’s eye, first, remove the plank from yours. (Matthew 7:3-5) You are not perfect, nor is your husband. However, both of you need to grow toward God, both with each other’s support and through God-led reflection. It will not be easy, especially at first, but nothing that is worthy of the Kingdom of God is ever easily achieved.

I will give this book to every single one of my friends that gets married, and will always recommend this book to women in their single season or even to women who are wondering where it all went wrong. Through the grace of God you can have a pure and beautiful marriage. However, never forget what our end goal is–to spread the Word of His mercy and goodness. God bless.

Happy Reading,
~the Brown-Eyed Bookaholic

Instagram: @browneyedbookaholic

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